JG 2023

(btw tbh means to be honest and btw means by the way in case you didn't know Mr Mercer because you are so old

And then we have Professor Tobias Hew Winden Mountbatten-Winsor Phillip Louis Rothschild-Burrell.

Whose photo is this?

Hitting the gym with henry steen and my friends was also fun

I don’t know whether you’ve ever met Raul, but he’s and absolute unit

I was sitting in Spanish, trying to pay attention to Ms Lopez

I dived into the toilet

trying to Brexit almost everyone when it was raining and you slid about a 10 metres was especially fun

I was merely the sacrifice to tempt him out of his hole.

He didn’t want to part with his fish

I heard a loud, wet fart that made me tremble to my knees

I became very interested in it, before meeting, and having a violent falling-out with, the genitive case.

We decided to go and get his fencing kit so that he would have some protection from the bush

He would just scream at them at the top of his voice and this would be enough to scare them to death

I noticed that my friend sitting next to me had a huge stain on his shirt

I still don’t know how we lost to College. Embarrassing.

It resulted in a scene like the man through the door in The Shining.

I put my Crocs into sports mode and started smashing it

Henry East, the ninja, crawled into their dorm

I hope dearly to do unspeakable things to the new first years when they come next year.

New Pupils day was fun; however, they were all quite spree.

There have been extensive debates, which mostly consist of Kai waffling on about some irrelevant topic

It could range from some mathematical proof to a fish drawn so terribly that it looks like a penis

Masters of vegging are the ones who seem the most innocent, such as Tobias Burrell

but it wasn’t just once; it was all the time I ever played someone ended up concussed

I had very good hand-eye coordination

Fast forward to this term, summer. This just makes the body odour of some people smell even worse - but we'll take it!

Then Mr Mercer told me I had two choices.

The adrenaline was already getting to me, and the laughter was boiling behind my mouth. Bosh!

(And here is a latin joke) If I asked you to conjugate with me will you decline?

I decided to go to the toilet for a break for 30 minutes.

The whole ordeal ended up with him in the third-year showers and me in his toyes, sitting menacingly

Alex Monaghan … Yeah he has big balls.

Would I have to give up my personality to join this community? Is this really the place for me?

Lavishly he stroked the budding hairs on his upper lip

it was all consensual

Med Centre was a theme, mainly because I could not be bothered to go to lessons - please do not tell my housemaster!

Firstly, Aaron will begin flexing his muscles in the full-length mirror

I conclude that Toby Burrell is a big vegger, Thai is unable to flip a bed and that Ernest is too loud in the bathroom.

I now understood that if I was late to one of Mrs Talks' lessons, I'd probably be expelled

Alex said he watched Uranus with a magnifying glass; the librarian was not impressed.

We were shouted at: "How childish of you! You are not in prep school you guys are honestly like 5 year olds!"

My first day was great. Then, lessons started. Div was taught by an old Collegeman. Quite a strange chap he was.

I had to put a fake smile on my face when I said good morning to the don in music school

We were treated like adults. This was sometimes a bad thing, especially for Aaron and Henry in Mr Mercer's Div lessons!

Little did I know that Mr Mercer would regret the decision

I have gone from viewing [one of you] as medically depressed to a hyper genius who shouldn't be allowed to consume sugar