Logical Fallacies

All Rock and Roll musicians are satanic.

Everyone uses AT&T- there must be something they know. Everyone needs to use it immediately.

People who are pregnant generally eat a lot of cake. My brother does too. He must be pregnant. 

All children hate healthy food.

I saw a Mexican today - I bet he came into America illegally and he is lazy as hell.

I must fly to go to theUS. If I fly, we'll crash and I'll die. So if I go to theUS, I will die.

My cousin loves chocolate and goes to METH. I love chocolate too. I should go to METH.

How can we fix immigration? Birds are immigrants, this is a natural process - so be like birds!

If I cook, I have to use a knife. Maybe I'll cut my finger and bleed. So I'll die from cooking.

Being a member of the PKK is like being a member of the AKP because they both live in Turkey.

Galatasaray is a poor team in Turkey  because it does not have enough money to manage the team.

The most popular sport in Turkey is football because everyone is always playing football. 

Fifty percent of the population has chosen me. So I'm not walking on the wrong path.

Simon is fat, but his doctor said he is healthy. So being fat won't cause any health problems.

I was with my girlfriend and a black cat sat by us. Then we broke up. It's because of the cat.

People who have to have a cup of coffee every day are like alcoholics who need alcohol.

Men will wear whatever is clean.

Ronaldo plays better than Messi because he is a better footballer than Messi.

Thomas stole someone's wallet and wasn't punished. So we can always steal without punishment.

I have a math exam now so I must find an Asian who can help me study.

A bird pooped on me. Then I played the lottery and I won the jackpot. Bird poop must be lucky.

Schools use textbooks made of paper, which is from trees. Trees give oxygen. So school kills.

There are 3,000,000 Muslims in the world - why don't you believe in Allah?